Funny Poem Book-like Shel Silverstein-Excuse Me Waiter But There's A Flyswatter

Description: NOTE: there is also an e-book version of Fritz’s book for only $2.99. If that interests you please comment on this listing and I will get back to you. (Any books purchased from this sale will be autographed by the author) @@@@@@@@@@@ Hello! My name is Fritz Fritzgerald and at one point in my life I peed in the snow, hated every food that was green, thought the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, and the Tooth Fairy were real, was scared of the monster in my closet, flushed my kid sister’s Barbie down the toilet, wondered what the Mystery Meat on my lunch tray really was, and from the corner of my eye, swore the pig I was dissecting in Biology class moved. The wonders, fears, surprises, losses, and rites of passage we all go through as we age are as timeless as time itself. In my new book “Excuse me Waiter, but there's a Flyswatter in my Soup” I leave no stone unturned because I’ve lived through it all and everyone reading it can relate. No matter what society, what location, or what era we live in, we have all experienced, in our own unique ways, what a skid mark in our underwear looks like. I honestly feel the world was a better place when Shel Silverstein was sharing his beloved humor with us. We all need to laugh again; we all need to remember what it was like to see the world through the eyes of a child; and we all need a good wholesome cry - if nothing else, then to remind us of what it feels like to let our guard down and feel an honest emotion that hasn't been adulterated by the drive for success. “Excuse me Waiter, but there's a Flyswatter in my Soup” is a collection of endearingly heartwarming and funny poem-stories, very reminiscent of Shel Silverstein, that remind us never to take a red slushie on a roller coaster, that advise us of what's REALLY inside our hot dogs, and that educate us on the correct way to pee in the snow. It will appeal because if you're human, you will relate. Everyone remembers what it was like to flick your booger, to hold a fart in at church, to collect your toenail clippings, and to hide your Broccoli in your chocolate milk, only to have your Mother's Xray vision be your downfall. But not only will this book make you laugh out loud with poems such as Little Stevie’s 10,000 Calorie Leaning Beef Tower of Burger, but it’s also chalked full of heartwarming and poignant story-poems like Skipping the Stone with Grandpa, Grandma’s Dollar Bill, The Grave, Tears, and The Old Man. (You’ll want to get a hug from someone after reading these.) In short, I’m nobody special, I’ve burped my ABC’s just like everyone else, but what I have managed to do is create a book filled full of all of these things I’ve mentioned – plus a lot more – that will help us all realize the one thing that life seems to have made us forget…black Jelly Beans really are outcasts! @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Seriously folks, if you're a fan of Shel Silverstein then this book is a MUST-HAVE. Almost 200 pages! You will laugh till you cry and cry till you...well, stop crying. Very humorous and extremely heartwarming "story-poems" will leave you begging for more. Once you pick it up you will not want to set it down!!! Here is a small teaser.... COLORFUL LESSONS by Fritz Fritzgerald Peeing yellow, peeing green, Now peeing red and blue, Peeing purple, peeing black, Then brown and orange, too. I should have known that this would happen But my conscience was too faint. So I guess I've learned the hard way, Do not drink the pretty paints! HODGEPODGE by Fritz Fritzgerald A chunk of pigs ear, A piece of his rear, And maybe a sliver of snout, A hip or a knee, Some lips and belly, And a part of the rump, I don't doubt. A portion of tails, And maybe toenails Coming off of that dirty old hog. 'Cuz they're leaving no waste Knowing you'll love the taste Of the things they've put in your hotdog! Get yours now!! Before they're gone! Please see my feedback and purchase with confidence.

Price: 6.99 USD

Location: Topeka, Kansas

End Time: 2024-12-24T01:13:58.000Z

Shipping Cost: 3.99 USD